The importance of a Christian dating relationship
To fully understand how to have a successful Christian dating relationship, we must first grasp the perspective of the unbeliever on the subject of dating. For this reason, we can affirm with a significant degree of certainty that Wikipedia defines dating perfectly.
As a stage in a romantic relationship, two individuals engage in an activity together, usually to evaluate each other’s compatibility as potential partners in a future intimate relationship.
The aforementioned definition of dating describes two individuals engaging in an activity together to evaluate each other’s suitability as potential partners for an intimate relationship.
For instance, some define “dating” as an intimate relationship between two individuals. In specific contexts, this relationship may be sexual; however, should it be? Therefore, we need to learn how to date as Christians.
Galatians 5:19 reminds us that the acts of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery. Furthermore, the Lord admonishes us, “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.”
For all that exists in the world, the lust of the flesh, the desire of the eyes, and the pride of life are not from the Father but from the earth. Furthermore, the world is passing away, along with its lust; yet he who does the will of God endures forever.
But is God not the creator of sex, some may ask? Yes, and here is why. God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it (Genesis 1:28).”
Having a successful Christian dating life is not a biblical principle.
Essentially, sex serves mainly for procreation, which is why the Bible addresses marriage starting with the first couple, Adam and Eve.
Others argue that dating can indeed be monogamous or open, serious or casual, straight or gay, short-term or long-term. These concepts are all constructed to suit and satisfy human desires.
Then someone may ask, “Are Christians not human beings?” Why shouldn’t they date? Yes, they are human beings and should date, but they should do so as Christians. Listen to what Jesus told his Father: “My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it” (John 17:15-16).
Christians can and should date, but according to the word of God, who protects them from Satan, the evil one. Like the Lord, they are not of this world. Instead of focusing on the flesh, they must prioritise their love for God.
A Christian should not seek the approval of man, but rather that of God. Similarly, one ought not to strive to please a person who is likely unworthy of being a servant of Christ (Galatians 1:10).
Some may argue that specific dating processes, rules, and types of individuals are suitable for a Christian dating group. These are considerations to reflect on; however, one should always adhere to the guidelines on how to date as a Christian.
As we are all part of humankind, any Christian wishing to date should prioritise God in their lives and strive to please Him in all their actions, including in the area of dating.
The golden rules of dating do not exist.
To realise this, birds of a feather flock together. Just as Christians should marry fellow Christians, they ought to date them as well. Otherwise, dating may become a recipe for disaster. Thus, Proverbs 27:17 states, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
We know that the priority in all things should always be the Lord (Luke 10:27 & Matthew 6:38). Additionally, believers ought not to date unbelievers due to the potential for marriage that may arise from a dating relationship. Bear in mind the Lord’s warning.
Do not be yoked with unbelievers. For what commonality do righteousness and wickedness share? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony exists between Christ and Belial? (2 Corinthians 6:14-15).
In dating, individuals often fall victim to infatuation, becoming overly obsessed with their new partner. This should not be the case. Conversely, it is essential to remember that there are significant differences between relationships and dating. Dating is inherently fluid and does not guarantee a long-term commitment to the individual in question.
The initial step in dating should always be a step of faith we take toward our Lord, Saviour, and greatest Treasure, King Jesus (Desiring God). Therefore, avoid jeopardising your Christian bond with the Lord by devoting excessive time, effort, and attention to pursuing dating or a new relationship.
How to have a meaningful and successful Christian dating experience is possible for anyone. When both of you, as Christians, commit to a faithful relationship with the Lord and seek to glorify Him in your lives, ensure that the person you are dating genuinely loves the Lord.
Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Another consideration is that on every date between believers, they must be mindful of one another’s connection to Jesus.
Are they actively growing in their journey with Christ? Do they wish to love Him above all else, including relationships or marriage? Are they ready to commit to learning how to have a successful Christian dating experience in His love?
Christians should remain mindful of their partner’s devotion to God. Many who overlooked this golden warning ended up marrying their parents, siblings, witches, wizards, and enemies. Therefore, they must continue to strive for their divine choice of partner.
However, when it comes to maintaining a proper perspective on dating, Christians should also avoid succumbing to desperation. Most individuals who date do not genuinely love one another; they share mutual affection and may experience a level of infatuation. Consequently, some churches oppose the practice of dating.
Therefore, certain church cultures, particularly in America, place a strong emphasis on marriage and apply pressure on unmarried believers to marry.
Indeed, it’s a way to initiate a relationship with someone you find intriguing. Within churches and Christian communities, there are numerous fascinating rules concerning dating. Some of these include refraining from holding hands or showing affection. Avoid sitting next to each other; instead, sit opposite one another.
Guidelines on how to have a successful Christian relationship.
They should date for a set period, with a chaperone present at each meeting. Consequently, they are planning to marry. However, the most effective rule within the church-Christian cycle is to avoid dating altogether.
Indeed, it is about waiting for a person’s “one true love” to arrive. “This calls for patient endurance on the part of the people of God who keep his commands and remain faithful to Jesus” (Revelation 14:12).
Nevertheless, please note that before God, no woman on earth is barren (Galatians 4:27, Genesis 25:21), and every human being has a destined life partner. Regardless of the circumstances, even if you are experiencing a delay, with patience and by adhering to God’s principles, your destined life partner will surely find you.
Regrettably, many believers neglect to seek spiritual guidance or their divinely appointed future partner through fasting and prayer. They often overlook the importance of waiting for the person whom God has specifically chosen for them to marry.
Due to infatuation, impatience, mistakes, and other factors, many individuals are entering unsuitable marriages.
Ultimately, the essence of dating is to ensure that your future partner is a genuine born-again Christian and the right person for you. We belong to God; He who knows us hears us.
He who is not of God does not hear Him. Now, let us acknowledge that we possess the spirit of truth and not the spirit of error. We love Him because He first loved us. And it’s all about achieving successful Christian dating as a Christian that matters to you and your loved ones.
